Das büt.

You know, at this point it's not that it happened, it's that there's no explanation. That's all I want. Just a simple one...well, one that explains things...those are the best explanations...as the word states.

Don't you hate those parts in your life where if you go forward it's like walking out into a mine field, and staying isn't much better? I'm not sure if lately I've been wanting to stay where I am because it's safe, or because it's what I want. Moving forward would mean uncertainty and a high chance of falling flat on my face. But staying still is just like being in what others call denial. Sometimes you can't tell if you are in denial, or if you really are just happy where you are. Sometimes staying still is exactly what you need. But, when the time comes to move, can you do it? I've been thinking this point over in my head for a good while now. Forward is new and a little dangerous. Here is safe and a little stale. Which is better? Both have advantages and disadvantages - in equal measure no less. Well, that's not necessarily 100% true. If things go 'as planned,' moving forward is the better option, but if they don't, staying is the better option. Basically: Leap then look, or look then leap - which will be the better option this time?

I bought shoes.
2 pairs.
It cost about $231.
Damn my monstrously huge feet in this country.
Damn them.
One pair cost about $140.
That's the most expensive clothing item I own.
Those shoes better land me a job.
Or a foot fetishist.
Either.
But I'm hoping for that first option.
Although the pay may be better with the second one...

I got told that I've lost too much weight today. Maybe that's why I skipped the gym today. Well that and it was raining and cold...but I should have gone. I can still go. What the hell, I'm off to the gym guys!!

What if everything I've ever thought about myself is a lie? How is one supposed to act, if they aren't even sure about who they are?
There are a few things that it seems I've always thought about myself which may no longer be true. In fact, they may be almost the complete opposite of what I had thought. Is it natural to change that much? Has enough time passed where these changes aren't so unnatural, but rather a natural, slow evolution of self? I can surely hope so. It doesn't seem like a good thing to go from one extreme to another without time at least. Changing that quickly is never a good thing. Something happened and the next thing I knew, half of who and what I was changed. It happened in the blink of an eye, and, in retrospect, it wasn't too terrible for self evolution, but at the time it was hard figuring out who and what I was. But the slower changes - how do those affect self? Are the slower ones actually worse in a way than sudden change? The slower ones one might not even notice for a long time until something happens to shove it in their face. If you don't notice the change, might you end up turning into something that you don't even like without knowing it until it is way too late to change? I don't think my changes are anything like that, but I have noticed that I have changed. If it's for better or worse we'll see. I don't think it's for the worse, but who knows? It might end up biting me in the bum one day. All I do know is that I don't think I'd change anything...and not just because I've given up regretting.

Then again, something that I can't help but regret may creep up. And then I may end up eating most of my words.

成年の日おめでとう！！
Happy Coming of Age Day!!

For anyone turning 20, you'd be an adult today...in Japan. Go out in your kimono-ey best and have a bite to eat. But make someone else pay - it's your day!
Now, an assortment of my favorite random pictures taken from images.google.com while searching for 成年の日 (seinen no hi):


Showing off their tennis-ey youth!!


A Korean actor who used to be mega popular in Japan - I own his workout book...don't ask.


Some dude probably named Iminho in Romanized Japanese...


...I have no idea...

An unneeded update or a crappy announcement - take your pick

This bra makes my boobs look pretty good.

That's it. End of the update/announcement.

No pictures 'cause they don't look that good.

Period came 4 days early - what up with that?

Pictures withheld despite Krisbones' expectations. I hope he can forgive me this post...


Well, that at least should alleviate any worries my parents might have - still not pregnant, guys. No worries.

Sometimes you just need to work without pants on. You do. Maybe not all the time. Unless you live in somewhere really hot...like Okinawa or Hawaii. Even Brazil (but that would be too sexy, so pants back on).

On another note which has little to do with pants, I went snowboarding today. It was nice. I sucked. But, it was my first time, so 'shouganai,' as they say here.

I think the thermometer on my alarm clock is optimistic. It says it's 9C in here. I can see my breath, especially well when I yawn.

I didn't study. I fail at life...and studying.

I should study.
I want to watch a crappy animated movie.

Life is full of choices. I think since I'll be eating soon I'll go for the movie...then STUDY!!!!!! (hopefully...) I'm having rice and gyoza. Good times. Hand made gyoza. Boiled. Delicious and relatively good for you. The rice is rice. No way to make that fancy sounding. It's "Love at first sight" rice though. I'm not kidding. That's the brand name. That is one of the reasons I first bought it. The other is that it's relatively cheap. Not the cheapest (which won't taste too good...I have a system, yo), but not far from it.


Also, I've decided to attempt to start learning French. It may come in handy in the future (wink wink nudge nudge)